Twin Stalker
by Somehow Sexy Rabbit
Summary: Yeah, so as the Hitachin twins try to function normally in society, if that is possible- they are left tortured and stalked by a little hooked girl obsessing with their apparent acts of twincest. Don't you just love it!
1. How to introduce a stalker

TWIN STALKER

Chapter 1- How to introduce a stalker

~Somehow Sexy Rabbit~

Yet another creepishly delectable story begins as Hikaru and Kaoru walk down the Ouran High School Host Clubs corridors once more, carrying with them their flirtatious attitudes making their ever obsessive fans want for undying love to spark once more. Did that line make any sense…? Methinks not. *giggles* methinks. Anyway, as they were walking along the corridors avoiding lessons, as they always seem too because their rebels, an unusual shadow was lurking behind them, one that can only described as some sort of hook headed beast. The twins seemed oblivious to the infatuated creature creeping among the long ever widening stretch of school that seemed to go on forever. An everlasting squeak from the newly polished floor caused both twins to stop and swerve around simultaneously like some sort of interpretive dance. They both recoiled as their hook headed character stood just a few feet away from them. Don't ask how many feet I only do cm, so I'll say about 120cm or around there, I dunno how many feet that is… -_-'

Standing in front of them revealed a small freckled girl with dark blue hair, reaching down to her knees. At the very top of her head fixed a sculpture like hook, that obviously showed high levels of very strong hairspray- but let's not ruin the illusion. She held in her hand two glittering pompoms making her look like some reject cheerleader. Each twin tilted their head with confusion, trying to figure out what the heck was standing in front of them. It must have been a good two minutes before Koaru finally gripped the courage to ask what the hell the girl wanted…

"Uhhh...wa" Before he could finish he froze with fear as the freaky looking teen pointed harshly towards the just interrupted twin.

"_You_……..and _you_……now" She fixated her finger on each twin, as they froze with both confusion and sheer fear. The way she spoke was not one of violence but of brain dead obsession, as she twitched her heart shaped eyes. I don't know how the hell that can even happen. It must be some type of creepy mutation, either that or a blood clot… I mean honestly heart shaped eyes.

The horrifying fact of a non-homosexual fan caused both twins to fall to the ground, before immediately jumping back up and escaping from the scene, leaving newborn teardrops floating mysteriously in the air. Again don't ask. How the hell am I meant to know why gravity somehow turned off? It's just something I've seen on anime before, so yeah 8( The hooked girl stood perfectly still before disappearing under the floorboards by some sort of under floor motor- Hmmm wonder where I got that idea from.

Pathetic little whimpers nearly identical in pitch began to arise from a nearby broom cupboard. Inside huddled in the corner, next to the flash guard and a box full of syringes and packets of sherbet like powder labeled 'Tamaki's' - he he, what other reason is there for Tamaki's creepy and hysterical personality. Yeah anyway, I digress… uhhh… oh yeah were the twins holding each other for some inbred gay comfort. "…What…what the heck happened out there...?*whimper*" Hikaru finally spoke for the first time in this freaky chapter- And that had nothing to do with not being able to remember his name *Shifty eyes* "I don't know but there is no f'ing way we can let that creepyliscious excuse for a girl, force us to perform our homo-erotic tendencies in public. I mean for one she's a girl, I think… And our gayness is not on demand it's a natural labor of hot gay love and you can't beat it……bitch"

As Koaru finished four knocks pounded on the door. Both twins hesitated for a moment, before finishing in silence- Ok now I'm just adding fancy words :3… Discombobulated… I'd love to know what that word actually means. Whoever stood on the other side stopped silent as well, before rustling the unlocked metal knob- *giggles* sorry I know immature. One final rustle caused the door to open slower then ……………..something that is slow…. And light illuminated the once black room. The twins closed their gay eyes… that were gay…and gay…- Running out of things to say D8 … Oh and a figure stood disapprovingly in the doorway…

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To be erotically continued.... :3

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Author note~

Ok to be honest I thought I had written like a page or 2 or atleast I did on word.... BUt now it looks very short. Yeah Please excuse my random outbursts that are shown as underlined sentences. X3 I think it was worth writing them in- for my own self pleasure... eww... sorry lol ummm yeah hope u like it. I only have manitoug15's amazing vaguely abridged series, as my knowledge for ouran so at any point if i get some context or info wrong please tell me then i will change it right away! Like I wrote on my profile please don't ask how my mind works. Soemtimes I creep myself out, and I know I do everyone else. So yeah, this is an author note thingy. yeah byebye for now!


	2. Unwanted Confrontations

Twin Stalker

Chapter 2- Unwanted confrontations

~Somehow Sexy Rabbit~

"What the _heck_ do you think you are _doing" squealed a voice so high pitched and annoying that it nearly deafened the embracing twins._ The figure paused for an instant and looked around the cramped cupboard before squeaking once more. "_MY CRACK_!" Tamaki stared horrified at both Hikaru and Koaru before exploding with pathetic anger…

"What the hell! You know without that stuff I can't function normally, I mean come on! I really hate having to put up with your insolence. If I had it my way I would have disposed of you long ago. We had a meeting just last night saying that you should never ever go anywhere near any of the 478 broom cupboards in this whole fcking place. Damn you damn you all!_ I _am the president me, all me, not you meeeeeeeeeeeee. So you should do what I say, so yeah!!! Come out of the closet right now.

Speechless about how pathetic and ear throbbing Tamaki's ridiculous speech was, both twins gathered themselves before making the best of a bad situation, and simultaneously spoke " I think it's _you_ who should come out the closet."

"….I…?...I…" Realizing that his ass had been truly whooped- Which he would probably like *giggles*- Tamaki did nothing more than recoil ever so slightly before running away in hysterics; tears streaming down his child like face. As he left his faint whimpers could be heard, before an ear piercing call for Kyouya, as he disappeared around the corner, still whining about his childish failure.

Kaoru peered his head out of the confined space, and signaled Hikaru that the coast was clear. As they left cautiously, they both chuckled to themselves about their victory over Tamaki. Only walking a mere 8 foot- Which is 243.84cm to be exact. Impressed or what- A much taller character emerged from the shadows. - They should really turn the lights on- Knowing it couldn't be the hook headed girl, they paused and grew unimpressed as Mori appeared silent as usual... "….Oh… Hey Mori…" Knowing they wouldn't be receiving a reply they simply turned and walked away, leaving Mori alone. "…Ug"

Hoping they wouldn't encounter any brain-dead cave men, creepy cheerleaders, or Tamaki, each twin made the effort to check around every so often, making sure no bad surprises came their way. "I know what could help!" Hikaru spoke. Kaoru looked puzzled but followed behind his brother through the Host Club's corridors.

Hikaru opened their bedroom door and targeted a decent sized chest, badly hidden by an old table cloth. He quickly tapped in the combination and the lock quickly fell to the floor. Koaru soon saw his brothers plans and sat back to let Hikaru have some involvement in the story. He rooted through many fluffy pink instruments of questionable size and shape. He took out a pink pronged baton with frilly pink material along the side. Even though they knew they were alone the twins still couldn't help but blush at the dangerous looking tool. "This should be all we need to protect ourselves." Kaoru simply nodded and they both left to return to the spot where they first started.

Each twin had a much more confident posture knowing that no one would dare go near such a florescent pink and barbed tool. They embraced once more putting their arms over one another in a feminine fashion. For once in the story they seemed safe.

Their stroke of confidence seemed short lived as a small monkey like creature shot like a dart out of the darkness, clinging on to Koaru's head. Muffled screams emerged from Kaoru's throat as a sign for Hikaru to kill the frisky ape and as quick as a flash Hikaru swung the pronged instrument towards the primate killing it instantly.

It fell to the ground, and didn't move. Koaru gathered himself and ceased to shiver from the untimely experience. The twins then took to seeing their attacker, knowing they had killed it in a painful manor. They then turned white with disgust for their actions. Hikaru, knowing what he had done shouted at the top of his voice, hoping a bolt of lightning would strike him down.

"HUNNY"

To be sadly continued… D8

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~Author Note~

Yea no progression in that story whatsoever and I feel very regretful of what I just wrote. I have also been told to say even though I'm guessing you already know I do not own Ouran or Lucky Star. I haven't even watched them… come on. Oh and I have nothing against hunny! I love him! X3 he's so darn cute. Yeah I was refraining from any dodgyness but that failed too. And I was refraining from too many author notes but when u notice something you just have to point it out don't you, anyway I hope I did ok and I'll see you next chapter! -O~O-


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